Slipping
by Kariout
Summary: Ciel tries to hide his true self from Elizabeth but is this keeping them together or slowly tearing them apart. When Elizabeth's curiosity gets the best of her what damage will it do to their fragile bond. Slight CielxSebastian


**Dislcaimer: **I don't own Kuroshitsuji

**X X X**

This was disgraceful. Stepping out from behind the screen was all I needed to do for the squealing to start. Goodness her voice could go high, yet at the same time squeaky beyond belief. Maybe that was her talent…

"OH CIEL! It's so cute! I couldn't have wished it to look better. Oh, oh, goodness! The bows are perfect!" Elizabeth was now totally engrossed in preening and puffing certain bows on my new attire she had bought me. The shirt and vest were fine if one liked flower patterns. However the jacket was a ridiculous combination of rose pattern, lace, bows, buttons, ribbons, and I thought I saw a little glitter. Good heavens the things I did for this girl.

"Ciel, I love it. I bet my outfit will fit perfectly with it. Don't you think?"

"I'm positive you are correct. However…don't you think…it might…be a bit much?" She giggled with such a casual grace; you could tell she had been bred in high society.

"Don't be silly Ciel. I bought these at a famous boutique in Paris. These are the latest fashion; we will be the envy of everyone when we go to London for the summer. Now stay right there, I'm going to go slip my dress on." With that she flitted from the room.

I sat slumped into a high back chair with a sigh. Elizabeth had been paying weekly visits to the manor as of late. Business with my toy company had been going well and no psychopaths had endangered the London scene as of late. Thus I had been privy to Elizabeth's every whim. She seemed to be happy and I must play my part to keep up appearances.

Closing my eyes I let my mind wander. I really shouldn't be so hard on her and her small flaws. She couldn't help it. I remember flashes of my childhood when we would sit and play for hours. We would come up with ridiculous excuses to draw out the time before we were parted. It seemed like a dream I had many years ago. I had changed. If that wasn't an understatement I didn't know what was. Yet she had changed as well. Something in my heart shied away from her very presence. Like the darkness that scatters at a sign of light. It was becoming increasingly hard to fake my love for her. I knew it should be there somewhere, that feather touch of love, but it wasn't. No matter how hard I stared at her face and remembered the good times, my heart would not remember the warmth it once held for her. She was my mask, my desperate grasp at normalcy that I had created for the outside world. It only took once for my disguise to falter and she would know. How would this end? Only in heart break I was sure.

Another sigh escaped my lips and I tilted my head. The hair falling over my good eye and hiding the light that filtered through my eyelid. Something stroked my cheek startling me out of my thoughts. I grasped the hand and looked up. Elizabeth looked down at me with a small smile.

"You looked like you were thinking hard about something. Are you alright?"

"I'm fine" I let go of her hand and stood up. I saw her dress for the first time. It was an identical match to my jacket. We looked like two ridiculous gaudy nightmares.

She twirled around fluffing her skirt up, "What do you think Ciel? Aren't they beautiful?"

"You look lovely Lizzie, but we might have to wait for the rest of London to catch up with this fad before we wear these in public."

"Oh don't be ridiculous, you can't be so self conscience Ciel. It's unbecoming." She huffed a little at my protest then turned to look in the mirror to fix her hair.

Oh goodness this was getting out of hand. My head was starting to pound with the first signs of a headache. I ran a hand over my face and looked up to see Lizzie staring at me.

"What is it?"

"Ciel, I don't mean to be rude but do you need that eye patch?" My eye widened. The question caught me off guard. No one had ever asked about my other eye. They all figured it was a sensitive topic and left it alone. I liked it like that.

"W..what?"

"I'm just wondering. You only wear that black one or the white gauze and I was just wondering if you really need it. It takes away from you facial features. Maybe we could replace it with something more…bright."

I stared at her. She had really lost it this time. What was she thinking? I let her drag me all over, dress my in ostentatious clothing, was it not too demanding that she leave private matters alone.

"Come here, let me see and we'll think of something different. Your face is your most important feature we can't let anything take away from that." She took a few steps forward and I reciprocated with the same backwards.

"No Lizzie, that isn't necessary."

"Now Ciel, you know I only have your best interests at heart. Plus I'm your fiancé, you shouldn't be embarrassed." My back hit the wall and she reached for my face.

"NO LIZZIE! THAT'S ENOUGH!" I slapped her hands away. My breathe quickened from the outburst and my heart sped up, adrenaline rushing through my veins in self defense.

She drew her hands back and looked at me. My brain froze. She wasn't tearing up or looking angry instead she had a look of curiosity on her face. It worried me even more than her tears.

"Ciel….you must be reasonable. We can't have any of your outbursts. It's childish. Now.."

She took a step forward with a small smile. This wasn't right. What was wrong with Lizzie, she didn't act this way. I was disarmed by her smile, it took only a second for her to whip her arm up and tear it across my eye. A few pieces of my hair caught in her grasp and she ripped them out along with my eye patch. A small grunt of pain escaped me as my hands flew up to my face.

"See that wasn't hard, now Ciel put your hands down."

She was yanking on my arms, trying to tear them from my face. I blindly stumbled to the side, knocking things over as I went. My shoulder rammed into a corner and all I glimpsed was a mass of ribbons and lace and a weight on my arms.

"Ciel! Ciel! Why won't you let me see! Why! Why! Why won't you let me in! I'm just trying to help you!"

Her weight was pulling my arms but I wouldn't let go of my face. I fell to my knees and laid my head on the floor my hands still pulled over my face. Elizabeth fell with me. She kneeled in front of me her hands turned into fists that beat at my back.

"Ciel! Why! Why won't you let me help you, why won't you love me back! I hate this! I hate it! I hate you! Why! Why are you like this! Why did you have to change! What is keeping you from loving me?"

I drew a deep breath and screamed, "**SEBASTIAN**!"

It only took a second. Her wrists were grabbed from behind in a gentle grasp by Sebastian.

"Miss Elizabeth, I think Ciel is tired from today's activities. May I escort you to your carriage?"

I kept my head down on the floor but I felt the tears drop on the back of my head as she let them finally fall. We sat there like that for a minute. Her silent sobs continued until she drew in a breath to speak.

"I'm sorry Ciel." With that she jumped up and ran out of the room. Sebastian's measured pace following after escorting her out. I lay there alone in the room. A chuckle escaped me. Who was I kidding thinking I was fooling anyone. Lizzie knew. She knew all my glances and smiles, my simple compliments, they were all lies. Everything I had done to try and look and act normal for Lizzie and she had known that I was slowly pushing her out, pushing her away from me. The niceties had only made her frantic and desperate to hold on tighter to me.

I heard the steps approach me and stop. Sebastian knelt down running a hand across my back in a rare soothing gesture.

"Well, it seems you have finally run the young Miss Elizabeth off."

"Shut up."

We sat there quietly, Sebastian running his hand along my back. It was calming. His very aura soothed me. It was like falling into a darkness that swallowed you whole but at the same time blocked everything else out. It should have frightened me with its emptiness but all I wanted was to be alone with that warmth.

"She knows."

"Knows what Master?"

"Knows I'll never be with her," I sat up sitting back on my heels.

"Hmm….well," he put a finger under my chin and lifting it and looked in my eyes. My one bright blue eye and the other scarred with the contract that bound me to him and him to me. "Maybe it is for the best. She cannot join us in the eternities."

"No, she can't. I wouldn't want that for her."

"That is all right Master, we shall have each other."

The darkness engulfed me.

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><p>Please review and let me know what you think. Thanks ^_^<p> 


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